At the time I had to work a Retail job to pay the bills. I worked 6 days a week - long, boring hours on a sales floor. I did like my coworkers and boss so it wasn't the worst place to be but, I forgot that Retail gets to tell you NO when you want to have time off for the holidays. Of course we were closed for Thanksgiving but in order for me to go home I would need 3-4 days off which wasn't going to happen. They needed me to work. You know, because Black Friday sales are more important than spending time with people you love. Complete bullshit.
Ugh. I was pissed. I got into a negative funk. I despised all the fall decor around the shops on my street and was in an inner state of panic because this would be the first year ever that I would miss having Thanksgiving dinner with my family. I would miss the chaos. My aunt being annoyed that my Mom never helps set up the food, and somehow gets away with it. My grandpa telling and laughing at his own bad jokes. My grandma being the loudest person in the room. The half traditional, half Mexican food. My grandpa claiming he ate the turkey neck (every year!) even though nobody ever sees it. The after turkey and too much booze naps. The olives on the appetizer table (I would usually eat all of them.) The after dessert trip to the movie theater. The last minute - lets go down and get in line for Black Friday sales and freeze our asses off - genius idea. And of course - the most important thing - the laughter.
Stupid work. I was so aggravated that I was working in Retail at the time. The irresponsible part of me just wanted to say Fuck It and take off for the holidays - who cares if I had this job by the time I got back! But of course I couldn't lose my job. I had rent to pay and friends depending on me. Guess I would just have to suck it up and work. So I had finally accepted that I would not be going home. Oh well. Major Sad Face.
Then walking into work a few days before Thanksgiving I went to check the board where my schedule was posted. I didn't even want to look at it because I knew it would just drive the knife in further but there it was in black & white:
Sabrina. Working. Working. Working. OFF.OFF. OFF.
Wait. Sabrina OFF!? Not working?? Not scheduled!?? Sabrina is off for 3 days!? How did this happen? Sabrina gets to go home for Turkey Day!? The Retail Gods were looking out for me! They didn't want to see me scoffing at faux leaf decorations and paper turkeys! Go home they said!
YAY! I couldn't believe my eyes! I even had to double check with my boss to make sure it wasn't a mistake!I was sooooo HAPPY!
Still on my Holiday Time Granted High I realized that I now have 3 days off but how was I going to get home!? Getting a flight 3 days before Thanksgiving was NOT going to happen. Would it?
So there I was - sitting on my apartment floor in San Diego desperately searching for last minute flights, the costs of a rental car, and even looking at carpooling with strangers just to get home. I was determined to get there, for I couldn't stand the thought of not being with my favorite people on that special day now that I had the chance to.
But try as I might it seemed my fate had already been decided. There were no flights out of San Diego and no cars I could afford. I searched on car share websites for a sane person driving home for the holiday but most people were leaving early or coming back late and it didn't correspond with my work schedule.
FUCK. I had the time off but no way to get there! ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? I was devastated. After having a good cry - one of those frustrated ones you see babies having when they just don't understand what is happening - I finally accepted that I would not be going home for Turkey Day.
Even though I wasn't able to be home with my blood related family I ended up having a very special day with my roommate family. We even cooked our own turkey! Looking back it was the right thing to happen. I was meant to experience something new with my best friends and I am fortunate that I have those moments in my memory.
Now its been a year and I am living back in the Bay Area. I am SO grateful to be able to spend time with my family this Thanksgiving. I don't need to worry about how to get there, or if I can go, because I am GOING and I am SO excited! I think not being able to make it last year really will allow me to be thankful to be around all the chaos this year and I can not wait to hear the laughter.
If you are able to spend time with those you love this year really soak it in. Cherish the moment. Not everyone is so lucky.
Patiently waiting for the feast,
<3 Sab
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